The Land of Bumbloo-Wee
Where Trumpy-Wumpy Rules (He Says)
Meet the squat, wattled, orange-faced creature who declares himself the greatest, rages at the slightest criticism, and rules Bumbloo-Wee with an iron comb-over. Plus his full cabinet of peculiarities.
How Trumpy-Wumpy Got That Way
The Origins of Bumbloo-Wee's Most Peculiar Creature
Every rotten egg was once a tiny egg. The origin story — from Daddy-Big-Wumpy's coded apartment forms to the bone spurs, the cheated contractors, six bankruptcies, and the friend from the Shadow-Dark Isle.
The Great Big Steal That Wasn't
Or: How Trumpy-Wumpy Tried to Keep What He'd Lost
Fake electors in seven states. Pressured officials. Pence refusing. The mob at the Capitol. The heroes who investigated. The convictions. And the pardons that followed — and what some of the pardoned did next.
The Very Slow Vanishing of Bumbloo-Wee
How Democracies Die — And How to Spot It Happening
Based on the Harvard scholars' landmark book. The four warning signs of authoritarian behavior, applied to Trumpy-Wumpy one by one. The language of dictators. The capture of justice. The midnight firing of watchdogs. And whether Bumbloo-Wee can hold.
The Nine-Hundred-Page Plan for Bumbloo-Wee
Or: Project 2025 and the Mandate for Everything
The Heritage Foundation's 920-page blueprint to remake the federal government. What it says, who wrote it, how it was denied, and how 53% of it was implemented in the first year — chapter by chapter, agency by agency.
Liberation Day! (And the Days That Followed)
Or: How Trumpy-Wumpy Declared War on Trade and Lost in Court
The tariff war in full — Liberation Day, the $6 trillion stock market crash, the 90-day flip-flop seven days later, China at 145%, allies tariffed alongside adversaries, and the Supreme Court ruling $166 billion in tariffs unconstitutional.
The Neighbors That Were Not for Sale
Or: How Trumpy-Wumpy Tried to Buy Two Countries and Found They Were Not Interested
Trumpy-Wumpy tries to buy Greenland and annex Canada as the 51st state. Don Jr. distributes MAGA hats to bewildered Greenlanders. Denmark lists the US as a national security threat. Canada's PM tells Trump "not for sale" — in the White House, to his face.
The Country That Was Not for Selling
Or: How Trumpy-Wumpy Brokered Peace by Helping the Aggressor
The Budapest Memorandum broken. Pootin called a "genius." The Oval Office confrontation. Military aid cut off. Intelligence suspended. The leaked peace plan echoing Russian demands. The minerals deal with no security guarantees. Europe stepping up. Ukraine still standing.
The Department of Trumpy-Wumpy's Justice
Or: How the DOJ Became a Personal Law Firm, the FCC a Weapon, and Eight Seashells a Federal Crime
Bondi's enemies list. The accidental Truth Social post. Comey indicted twice — the second time for seashells spelling 8647. Bondi fired for insufficient vengeance. The FCC threatening Kimmel. $200M university settlements. Don Lemon arrested. Harvard fighting back.
The Land Where Papers Were Not Enough
Or: ICE, Deportation, and the Disappearing of Due Process
170+ US citizens detained. 3,800 children held. A five-year-old in a Spider-Man backpack used as bait. 400 people zip-tied at a racetrack. Proud Boys anthem played at ICE recruitment. Renée Good shot in the snow. The land where papers were not enough.
Trumpy-Wumpy's Cabinet of Peculiarities
Or: Loyalty Over Competence — A Field Guide
A Fox News weatherman runs the Pentagon. An anti-vaxxer with a brain worm runs Health. A Putin admirer runs Intelligence. An FBI director hands out bourbon bottles. Three women fired in eight weeks. Signalgate. The most unqualified Cabinet in US history.
The Swamp That Got Swampier
Or: What Happened When the Swamp-Drainer Became the Swamp
Drain the Swamp? Net worth up $3.5B while in office. Qatar's $400M airplane gift. $TRUMP meme coins (buyers lost 92%). Mar-a-Lago at $1M membership. ABC paid $15M. The crypto summit. Saudi golf. Cabinet pay-to-play. The Emoluments Clause: still in the Constitution.
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